There is a time and place for each conflict style, although the Avoiding style is one of the least overall helpful styles across situations — and so you’ll hear us adding “but” to each of these three possible times when avoiding may make sense:

Scenario 1: Avoiding *may* make sense when the situation really doesn’t matter to you. If you really do not care at all about the issue, perhaps your immediate interests can be met by Avoiding. You run the risk, however, of damaging relationships if resolving the issue is important to others.

Scenario 2: When dealing with a very difficult or toxic person, sometimes avoiding is actually the healthiest way forward. There is often little to be gained and much to be lost with extremely difficult colleagues. However, I have to warn you that most people do *not* fall into this extreme category. Even though we may find some personalities clash with our own, most of the time it is better to learn to discuss interests and improve communication than to avoid.

Scenario 3: Avoiding may also make sense when inaction in the conflict will result in an outcome that you can live with. In other words, if the situation is structured such that if nothing changes, you are comfortable with it anyway, and you are happy with the status quo, then avoiding it could meet your interests. Again, a warning that this may still damage relationships, as others may have an expectation that we care about their well-being and concerns.